2017-07-12 / News of The Weird

NEWS OF THE WEIRD

BY THE EDITORS AT ANDREWS MCMEEL
Distributed by Universal Press Syndicate

Oh, Canada

What could go wrong? Canadian company Bad Axe Throwing announced in June it is bringing its unusual entertainment concept to Denver. It’s “like darts, but on steroids,” says founder Mario Zelaya. Customers provide their own food and beer and learn how to throw axes at targets. “We’ll be bringing along the competitive league side as well. That means that folks in Denver can sign up ... and compete at a global level,” Zelaya said.

Smooth eactions

¦ Did you say french fries or FRESH fries? Eiram Chanel Amir Dixson, 25, made a point of ordering fresh french fries at a Coon Rapids, Minn., Wendy’s drive-thru in May. When the exchange between the dissatisfied Dixson and a Wendy’s worker escalated, the employee threw a soda at Dixson, and Dixson fired back by spraying Mace through the drive-thru window. Police charged Dixson with one count of using tear gas to immobilize.

¦ Rachel Borch, 21, of Hope, Maine, was out for a run in June when a raccoon attacked her. Thinking quickly, Borch grabbed the animal and, despite being bitten, ran to a puddle on the trail and held its head underwater until it drowned. (BONUS: Borch’s father retrieved the dead raccoon and delivered it for rabies testing in a Taste of the Wild dog food bag.)

Insult to injury

It was dark in the wee hours of June 30 in Jacksonville and Cedric Jelks, 38, probably never saw the loaded gun on the driver’s seat of his car as he got in, but he certainly felt it after the gun went off, wounding his manhood. When police investigating the report of a gunshot wound arrived at the hospital Jelks was taken to, they added possible firearms charges to his pain after discovering Jelks had a prior conviction for cocaine possession.

Why not?

A driver in Zhenjiang, China, took drive-thru service to the next level on June 10 when he carefully pulled his tiny automobile through the front doors of a convenience store, requested a package of potato chips and a bottle of yogurt, paid for his purchase and reversed through the doors with the cashier’s guidance. Surveillance video shows the cashier waving and saluting as the car pulls away. He posited that the driver might have been avoiding getting out of his car in the rain.

Finer points of the law

¦ A restaurant owner near Florence, Italy, was ordered to pay 2,000 euros in fines in June after judges in Italy’s highest court declared it illegal to keep lobsters on ice in restaurants because it causes them undue suffering. “The suffering caused by detaining the animals while they wait to be cooked cannot be justified,” the judges ruled.

¦ In a fit of law abidance, a resident of Yorkshire, England, called that country’s emergency phone number to report that Queen Elizabeth II was not wearing her seatbelt as she departed the Palace of Westminster on June 21 after delivering her traditional speech at the State Opening of Parliament. Police warned that the 999 system is meant to be used only for emergencies.

Bright ideas

Smoke bombs aren’t just for celebrating our nation’s birth. Mike Tingley of Grand Blanc Township, Mich., burned his garage to the ground on July 3 when he used smoke bombs to try to rid the structure of a bees’ nest. When firefighters from three townships arrived, fireworks stored in the garage were shooting into the sky. “We really weren’t going to celebrate the Fourth of July so much,” Tingley said. His home, which was not attached to the garage, was not damaged.

No help here

Two unidentified thieves managed to elude capture even after one of them nearly lost his pants during a Wellington car break-in. The man, caught on a security camera June 18 while running back to a getaway car, tripped over his pants and landed facedown, clearly yelling, “My pants fell!” He managed to make it to the vehicle, and the thieves have yet to been identified.

Oops

Jerry Lynn of Ross, Pa., is continually haunted by the result of a minor mishap 13 years ago while drilling a hole in the wall of his living room. During his project, an alarm clock fell through the hole and to the floor behind the wall. Since then, the alarm sounds dutifully at 7:10 p.m. (standard time) every day.

The entrepreneurial spirit

Ventura County California sheriff’s officers charged three produce workers with grand theft fruit after they were caught making unauthorized cash sales of avocados from a ripening facility. Joseph Valenzuela, 38, Carlos Chavez, 28, and Rahim Leblanc, 30, liquidated up to $300,000 worth of off-the-books avocados. “It’s a big product here in California,” said Sgt. John Franchi. “Everybody loves avocados.” ¦

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