Top 10 Reasons to Evacuate

10. There aren't enough cotton clothes in the world to combat a South Florida summer without air conditioning (or cold beer).

9. Vienna sausage: It's what's for dinner.

8. Your front yard is 29 inches above sea level.

7. If a big one hits, you can brag to everyone: "I just KNEW it was gonna be bad!"

6. Your cat is planning on a week of solitude; you wouldn't want to disappoint him.

5. You'll have something really dramatic to say on Facebook.

4. It's kind of exciting competing with 3 million people for a few thousand hotel rooms in south Georgia.

3. It gives you a chance to fill out your "Extreme Home Makeover" application.

2. You always feel so clever driving 60 mph up Highway 17 while the radio reports gridlock on northbound I-75.

And of course, the number one reason for going to all the trouble to evacuate:

1. It's the surest way to make certain that absolutely nothing actually happens to your house!

— Libby Boren McMillan, Florida Weekly