All the Single Ladies! All the videos!

Last December, I came up with the brilliant — or not so brilliant — idea to attend all of the area's different versions of "The Nutcracker."

After I oh-so-willingly suggested this idea, I realized (belatedly) that I'd have to attend all those Nutcrackers.

Believe me, after seeing a few, I was Nutcracker-ed out.

In fact, I'm not even attending a single "Nutcracker" this season.

But this month, I unintentionally gorged myself on another cultural phenomenon, though a much more modern one — Beyonce's video "Single Ladies (Put a Ring On It)."

If you haven't seen it, it's 3 minutes and 29 seconds of sheer attitude, audacity and hip-shaking sexiness.

To say that Beyonce's bouncy hit is hook-filled is an understatement. It includes a call-and response ("All the single ladies!"/"All the single ladies!") and a recurring section that sounds like someone saying "uh-oh" over and over, as if they realized their mistake — or someone is mocking them.

The song is an admonishment to a former admirer that if he "liked it, then he shouldda put a ring on it!" Obviously, the guy failed to do anything to keep her or commit. He played it too cool, and now someone else is interested.

Beyonce's album, "I Am...Sasha Fierce" (Deluxe Edition). COURTESY PHOTO The song is joyfully, relentless repetitive.

And, like so many other people, I just can't get enough of it.

Time magazine deemed it one of the Top 10 songs of 2008, calling it "ludicrously infectious."

It's pop in its purest form.

And the video! The music video for this song is a study in simplicity.

Filmed in black and white like a '50s French film, it features Beyonce and two female back-up dancers. The background is white, pure, and completely uncluttered.

Beyonce and her dancers look like Barbie dolls of color: dressed in black leotards and heels, eyes heavily painted and mascara-ed, long hair poofed up on top.

And just like a Barbie doll, their dancers' legs seem disproportionately long.

The women pop and shimmy, they prance about and wiggle their hips sensuously.

Like the Supremes dancing to "Stop! In the Name of Love," they hold up their left hands like traffic cops. Then, in a modern twist, they quickly show the back of the hand, the palm, the back of the hand, the palm.

"See, no ring," they seem to be saying.

It also suggests the "talk to the hand" gesture.

The trio strut, shake their index fingers in admonishment, and smack their rumps (making me strangely nostalgic for the days when Akon's "Smack That" was more ubiquitous on the airwaves.)

Beyonce has said that the video was shot entirely in one take, and the camera does at least two complete 360 degree-turns around the women during the dance.

The video has spawned numerous parodies and tributes, becoming something of an Internet phenomenon. Almost everyone, it seems, wants to make a video of themselves dancing like Beyonce to "All the Single Ladies."

There was Justin Timerlake's parody on "Saturday Night Live" when Beyonce was the guest artist. Timberlake, Andy Samberg and Will Forte all played Beyonce's back-up dancers. And yes, they were all dressed in leotards, stockings and heels.

(Besides being a source of great amusement, it made me happy to know that at least three men were discovering firsthand what it's like to have to dance in heels.)

Everyone seems to be making a "Single Ladies" dance video, from slinky gay men to college girls to a preschooler in a pink leotard to a bubba in a baseball cap doing some odd, decidedly unsexy, line dance.

One video is introduced as "two middle-aged men, one laptop, a bottle of wine, and no shame." It features two men (one tattooed and goateed) trying to impersonate Beyonce in a miniscule kitchen while women off-camera laugh, hoot, and egg them on.

One of my favorites is Cubby, a rolypoly plus-sized man who, yes, dons a black leotard, and shakes it for all he's worth. His video has received over two million hits.

Then there's the young woman in Fairbanks, Alaska, who performs it in the snow, while the temperature's only 2 degrees. Unlike Beyonce, she's wearing gloves and boots. But like Beyonce, she's dressed in a leotard. In the snow!

Brrrrr.

There's a queen-sized woman who dances in front of her kitchen, then spends at least as much time postdance gasping for air, wiping the sweat from her face, and talking.

There are trios of friends dancing in basements, in living rooms, in gymnasiums, in parking lots, in lobbies. A group of young women perform the choreography at an outdoor pep rally.

The videos range from amateurish to quite impressive. Shane Mercado, a young, classically trained dancer, is probably the best, with his slinky moves and attitude plus. His video's received over three and a half million hits, while the video of him performing live on "The Bonnie Hunt Show" received over two million hits. (The live performance makes it look as if he's actually in the video itself.)

And while some find the videos with young kids cute, to me they're as disturbing as beauty pageants for the kindergarten set. Do you really want your 4- or 7-year-old dancing in such a provocative way?

But then, I was surprised to come across a video of Gwen Verdon, and two back-up dancers, dancing to "Mexican Breakfast." Information on the video has been difficult to find, but it looks as though it was shot in the '60s.

The choreography is by Bob Fosse.

And the moves — well, the moves look a lot like the moves on "All the Single Ladies," only not quite as sexually blatant.

Apparently someone else thought so too, because they put a video on You- Tube with Ms. Verdon and company dancing to Beyonce's song.

And know what? It fits.

Beyonce has since said that her video was "inspired" by Bob Fosse.

One can only wonder what he'd feel — complimented or ripped off.

In the meantime, there's no proof the video's inspired less passivity and more commitment from men…but it's sure inspired some entertaining videos.