Straight from the headlines
. "Elephant beats heroin habit with detox" (Reuters, 9-4-08) — Chinese poachers had spiked his bananas with heroin to control him.
. "Police: Chihuahuas provoke baton attack on nude beach" (KGW-TV website, 7-28-08) — A naked beachcomber, 74, near Portland, Ore., might have overreacted to two Chihuahuas advancing on him.