Superhero Movie

Running Time: 85 minutes
MPAA rating: PG-13

Don't be fooled by the running time listed above. "Superhero Movie" is actually a little over an hour long, with about 10 minutes of outtakes and then a couple minutes of credits. So, you're getting essentially half a movie, but paying full price.

And that's only the beginning of this rip-off.

"Superhero Movie" isn't as bad as "Meet The Spartans" or "Date Movie," but that's not really much of a compliment. It's kinda like saying, "Well, the tumor's not THAT big."

The film stars a gaggle of C-list comics and has-beens who allegedly spoof the first "Spider-Man" film (which came out six years ago, so you know the jokes are going to be fresh); but instead of the hero being bitten by a radioactive spider, the guy gets nipped by a genetically modified dragonfly.

The film plods along, following the same plot as the Spider-Man movie, with a few diversions to make fun of The X-Men and Batman franchises. The laughs are few and far between, and are usually prompted by the film's only saving grace, Leslie Nielsen, the master of deadpan camp delivery.

In fact, the only reason I would recommend watching "Superhero Movie" is because it'll probably be Nielsen's last film. I mean, the guy can't last much longer. Leslie Nielsen's so old that at his bar mitzvah he received the gift of Fire.

And for the record, that joke is 100 times funnier than any line in "Superhero Movie."

Here's the problem with "Superhero Movie" and the rest of the so-called spoof genre: Recognition isn't a punch line.

For example, in an early scene, the hero (Drake Bell) gets an instant message on his computer: "Professor X has added you as a friend on Facebook." This is supposed to be funny, because The Kids Are On The Facebook, and they'll laugh cuz we said Facebook.

I'd like to think that "Superhero Movie" would be the last time we see one of these spoof flicks ever again. But then I'm reminded that I live in a country where "Are You Smarter Than a Fifth Grader?" is a hit TV show.

(c) 2007 King Features Synd., Inc.